Leaders not Teachers

Often, more than I like to admit, observing parents is like listening to a beginner play a violin that is out of tune. There’s harmonic-resonance when the adult and child are attuned. And then, there is what most think of as parenting and teaching: Watch out! Don’t do that. I told you to be careful. Don’t touch. Get over here right now. Not now. In a minute. How many times do I have to tell you? Are you listening? Hello!

Manufactured Vax-Hysteria

What has become Vax-Hysteria, like most major controversies, is scripted. I love citing the BBC reporter, live, describing that Building Seven at the World Trade Center on 9/11 was falling, which could be seen standing in the shot behind her, twenty-minutes before it did in fact collapse. The obvious question is; who wrote the script? The unbridled role media plays in Manufacturing Consent, The Political Economy of the Mass Media (Noam Chomsky,1988), is the true role and function of corporate media. But we forget, which is the point.

Themes: 
vaccinations

Meeting our children half way

We ‘dults’ have very fixed ideas about how everything must be. “Oh, my, its late, we need to have this done this way and that done that way by such and such a time.” Then comes the next task and the next, all day long, day after day. Even when we are completely engaged with the task De Jure we are anticipating the next with its deadlines, time schedules and pressure. And this basic mind-set we impose on our children, for their own good, of course.

Themes: 
child of the dream

U.S. Opposition to Breast-Feeding Resolution

Forget the Declaration of Independence, One Nation Under God. We the people of the United States threaten to unleash punishing trade measures and withdraw crucial military aid if nations support language tainting the $70 billion infant formula industry – the latest in our nation’s Declaration of Profits over People.

Themes: 
breastfeeding

Kidnapped

Kidnap: to steal a child, to seize and hold or carry off a person against that person’s will by force or fraud (Webster’s dictionary definition)

Trump’s Zero Tolerance Border Policy. Let’s call it what it is, a kidnapping of thousands. Our government, like the definition, has stolen by force or fraud, children, even babies. They simply took them away from their parent or parents.  They have traumatized thousands of youngsters creating long-term harm. The younger they are the more lasting the trauma.

Those who planned, organized, carried out and continue it are criminals. They should be charged and punished. There were no Amber Alerts, neighborhood searches, radio, TV alerts asking people to join in finding the stolen child. Often these children were taken away in the dead of night.  Why unless they knew what they were conducting was wrong. Simply that – a crime.  What if the baby or child stolen was yours or your grandchild, or a friend’s? Would you turn away, or even worse, condone it making excuses. This criminal act is a stain on our nation, and on us.   It betrays our national humanitarian values.

Detention camps for children? For babies?! For God’s sake America, wake up! Is this what we are becoming? Child abusers? Kidnappers?

Themes: 
freedom

Forgive us, for we know not what we are doing

A woman was beating her infant-toddler in a stroller in front of our gallery. This is a busy tourist destination. One of my colleagues rushed out the door. “Stop that right now,” she said, as others stood by in silence. We are responsible for our children’s behavior, and yet we punish them for our sins, and have for centuries. "Father, forgive us, for we do not know what we are doing."

Themes: 
parenting
abuse-neglect

Like a Bruegel Painting

I wonder what good it will do to repeat decades of research on mother-infant separation when current research is systematically shredded, manipulated, twisted, repressed, bought, fabricated, intentionally confused, in a world where confusing has become the preferred policy. After all, political propaganda is a powerful form of control. My favorite is the report that Building 7 had collapsed on 9/11 twenty-minutes before the building collapsed. The first irony is that Building 7 could be seen behind the BBC reporter describing its collapse. The greater irony is that no one seemed to care who wrote the script? Cut. On to the next media event.

Strategically separating children from parents to achieve a political goal is planned, intentional torture of innocent children. A 2017 US Government Report describes the widespread use of separating families as a matter of policy, pre Trump. Since 2005, as a matter of procedure and policy, border agents routinely separate children and families intentionally, as punishment or consequences, through what the DHS, (the Department of Homeland Security) call its Consequence Delivery System. These consequences are meant to deter future migration, often regardless of international protection or other humanitarian concerns. Who cares? A few thousand kids? They call it collateral damage, often a small price to pay to achieve a political goal. (I often wonder, for those who wrote the script, were the lives lost on 9/11 collateral damage?)

Themes: 
democracy
freedom

The Child Creates the Father

Themes: 
fathers

Relationships


Recently, my son, now 40+, and I shared a few thoughts about relationships.

Themes: 
relationship

Ten Nevers One Always

Of course, never hit, spank or physically punish a child; time out is a punishment. Understand instead that you are equally to blame. When frustrations rage, invite empathy for yourself and the child. Look for a story that will lead, invite and encourage what needs to be done.

Never blame a child. Observe and share together natural consequences.

Never shame a child. Describe how you are feeling in ways that focus attention on, as Marshal Rosenberg, the founder of nonviolent communication, would say, will make your life wonderful.

Themes: 
parenting

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