Good Toys - Bad Toys

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Something special to consider this Holiday Season.

Themes: 
play
toys

Appreciation

Appreciation is a way of life, much more than it is a holiday. Even the capacity and experience of appreciation is a profound gift. I’m sure trees and flowers in their way appreciate sun and rain. Each species shares its special reality. The experience of being human is truly one of the rarest in the living universe – and if we appreciated that, our unity and diversity each day, what a wonderful world it would be.

Themes: 
intelligence
self image
violence

Revisiting Magical Parent - Magical Child

I recently released the third edition of Magical Parent – Magical Child co-authored with Joseph Chilton Pearce. If you have not read it – I encourage you to do so now.

From the forward to the third edition:magical parent book cover

Magical Parent – Magical Child began with a simple insight; The Future Is Now. If I am aggressive or kind today chances are I will be the same way tomorrow and my children will be too. If I want to bring about real change, a new pattern or possibility, a baby step forward in evolution it must take place now, this moment. By changing how I think, feel and act - now - I create a different next moment. If I don’t change now - I will be tomorrow what I am today.

Gandhi said; ‘be the change we want to see in others’. This insight brings that change, which is the future, into the present. Right now is where all the action is. Now is the only chance we’ve got.

Joseph Chilton Pearce added depth to this basic insight when he described the ‘model imperative’ in his bestselling book, The Magical Child. Each of us represents vast capacities, more and greater than ever imagined. The awakening and development of each capacity requires a model-environment to serve as a catalyst for that potential’s opening and development. No model – no development. That is the ‘model imperative’.

Becoming a Magical Parent is not really different from becoming a world class athlete or singer. All we need is a safe space to practice and experienced mentors (the model-imperative). Magical Parenting means really playing the game called being a parent. When we are really playing, that is, in the state of authentic play failure isn’t possible. Unlike high stakes testing or the World Series, given a safe place to practice and experienced mentors, meeting every challenge becomes an opportunity to expand and develop our capacity to meet every challenge. There are no right or wrong answers. The score of the day is irrelevant. Rather, the goal is continuing expansion of capacity and potential which takes placed naturally in the optimum state called play.

An educator used Magical Parent – Magical Child as the text for her class. She asked a few probing questions. You may find them of interest.

Themes: 
bonding
childhood
communication
play
violence

Skin to Skin, Bonding and Brain Development

Rachel wrote:
I have a question around bonding/brain/skin-to-skin.  I have a 7 week old, that I am attachment parenting...carrying in arms, co sleeping etc.  I spent a lot of the first 4- days with skin to skin, however since then hardly any skin to skin (as it is winter and I have two other children so it's not convenient.)  Can you give me some information around whether the skin to skin I did for the majority of the first 4-5 days was sufficient for optimal brain development/bonding or whether I should still be doing this?  Thank you. LOVE the website and the work you are all doing - it's the best thing for the world!

Themes: 
bonding
brain
parenting
play
pleasure

Toys, Agression and Make-Believe

Janet wrote:
How should we respond to children bringing their toy gun look-alikes to school and then playing war or fighting games with these? It is not that they are playing the games, but the use of the look alike weapons that I am interested in. Does this in some way do some damage to children because guns/weapons are seen as signifying violence (or protection depending on who you talk to! ) in our culture? Or do adults just end up projecting their fear of these weapons onto the children and a child playing with a look alike weapon is in fact no different from a child picking up a stick and saying bang, bang. I recognize that there may be a range of answers to this depending on the child's background and the culture of the home.

Themes: 
play
violence

The Lifelong Value & Impact of Early Experiences

A long time colleague, Kali Woodward, Director at American Youth Literacy Foundation, sent a link to a New York Times article - The Case for $320,000 Kindergarten Teachers. The article describes a Harvard study following 12,000 kindergartners for twenty five years and confirms, as many other studies do the long-term impact of early experiences, in this case the value of good a Kindergarten teacher.

The first rung on the ladder holds up the rest. The very early stages of human development provide the foundation for all that follow. As is our habit and social conditioning the research paper focused on Kindergarten Teachers and concluded that the impact of a ‘good one’ translated into lifelong learning and earning potential (in children and therefore long term economic impact) valued at $320,000/year.

Themes: 
education
parenting

Sexual Monogamy & Violence Against Women

James W. Prescott, PhD is causing trouble again (and I’m glad he is.)

Do we have full gender equality? Why not?

At the core of Jim’s research is a mind/body split created by the male dominated intellect constructing images, beliefs, religions moral codes that proclaim the body, its sensations and pleasures, to be evil – resulting in an anti touch, anti sensuality, anti woman campaign perpetuated by men in order to control female sexuality and pleasure. The roots of this Violence Against Women (and children) are deep. Remember the Inquisition and its witch hunts that lasted 300 years?

Themes: 
James W. Prescott
violence
women

Pleasure Bonds

bruegel Icarus

Like a Bruegel painting (1525- 1569 depicting monumental events that most never see, Landscape with the Fall of Icarus,' is a prime example), the collected works of James W. Prescott, PhD, have gone mostly unrecognized for 50 years. The reason: his research and steady stream of observations cut to the core of the human condition.

Themes: 
pleasure
attachment
bonding
sensory deprivation

Crisis In Consciousness

krishnamurti

A true revolutionary, J. Krishnamurti was one of the most influential teachers of the 20th century. He challenged the conditioning that traps the heart and mind in habitual patterns, patterns that inevitably breed personal and global conflict, organized religions, nationalisms, personal and social ideologies with their images.

"When thought invents God,’ he says, ‘God is not sacred.’ Krishnamurti views human consciousness as one undivided whole. ‘We are the world,’ he observed, and he meant that literally.

Themes: 
Krishnamurti

It is done onto us as we perceive, believe, and do onto others.

Suzann Arms of Birthing the Future is planning an international symposium on birth and how it affects the way the brain and therefore how culture develops. She asked for feedback – Though you might be interested…

Suzann 
It is done onto us as we perceive – as we believe – as we do onto others.

The emphasis you placed on birth – being the foundation of human development – is of course critical. I suggest that there is another focus, one that is deeper and more nurturing. The core insight driving all of our activities at Touch the Future is summarized in the preface for a new book in development Kids are NOT the Problem.

There is a pervasive, near universal perception – parenting is about kids. Just about everything a parent does and often thinks about is about ‘the kid.’ An alternative point of view, a completely different paradigm, is that kids provide the necessary catalyst for evolutionary development in adults. The first, parenting is about kids, places children, their care, education and development in the spotlight. They are the goal and focus of attention and resources. The second, becoming a parent is about adult development with kids providing the stimulus for this continuing growth, places the adult center stage. Adult growth and development then becomes the goal, focus of attention and target for resource investments. It sounds selfish but it’s NOT.

Themes: 
birth
bonding
brain
culture

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